Note for myself

Sometimes you miss a place where you've been before so strong, you almost wanna cry. That is the feeling I have now... I've been in Germany for a year in 2012 and had the absolute most amazing year I've ever had. After living all my life in Turkey, Germany was  'freedom' for me... I've never felt so self-confident, independent, social and happy in my life. Now I miss those days... I miss my friends...  I miss the feeling I had in Germany. Right now I'm listening to the radio channel which I'd listened a lot  when I was in Germany... And I'm listening to 'Mad World' at this moment which makes me more and more depressive. I've never felt belonged to any place I lived before. All the cities I've lived in were always temporary for me. I had the most amazing times in Germany but I'd missed Turkey a lot when I was there. So I know this feeling is temporary as well. I even miss italy sometimes a lot even though I visited Italy only once for a week... I find it kind of funny, i find it kind of sad... I have an emptiness in me and I can't put any place there that I can call it as it is my hometown. I can't put there one but wanna have them all there in me... Anyway...

Dear me, please consider you might go live in a city anywhere in the world for couple of months in the next winter. Consider that you can learn a little foreign language and spent your money in a wise way rather than spending your money for 10 days long honeymoon... Malta would be a nice choice... You might improve your English, make new friends and enjoy the view of medditeranean coasts in a cozy island...

Dear me, please travel a lot... World is big but not the world you live in right now... Travel to other continents...  Travel as far as you can possibly afford... Live for that... Experience different cultures... Have stories in other land, anywhere other than where you are right now... Because you know, that is exactly what makes you alive...

A lovely pic taken by a lovely russian friend in Germany... Lovely times...

Wow... I really can't handle wit my emotions right now... The desire of being somewhere else is so strong  I feel numb...